Oedipus Lex

So Harry used the P- word. Stop press, hold the front page. Now, I’m not asian or Muslim so Polly Toynbee would reason I am ineligible to comment. Interestingly I happened upon the Humanist Society website today, saw La Toynbee was president and as a result considered conversion to either Chassidic Judaism or the Pentecostal Church of the Screaming Loony. Anyhoo, Harry used the P-word and our friends at the News of the Screws saw it as their civic duty to tell us all. Lucky us. Well lucky them actually. Lucky them that this time they did their research. It turns out that this time the video was real, Harry has apologised to prove it is real. As opposed to the last time they had an army expose which they felt it was their obligation to inform us of – remember the fake Iraq pictures? The ones with the ‘Iraqi’ with a sandbag on his head? The pictures who everybody with a jot of military knowledge knew were fake? I remember them every time  I see Piers Morgan’s smiling face on whatever reality TV show he is selling his soul on this week. Morgan, you have blood on your hands.

So Harry said the P-word. Yep, it’s not big, it’s not clever and it’s not acceptable in polite society. But that’s it, he isn’t in polite society. To quote George Orwell: “People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf.” Harry is in the army and people in the army have very rude nicknames for each other. It has been said that if Napoleon’s army marched on its stomach then the British army marches on its sense of humour. Watching the video you can clearly see he is joking. The orders part where he is seen on the phone saying “love to the corgies, ya, ya, God save you grandma” is actually very funny. This guy is trying to be normal in a very surreal world. His mother and her memory have turned in to a circus, go to Harrods and look at the memorial if you are in any doubt. Add to this that he will never be king like his older brother. He is trying to make a life for himself in the army for real, unlike his uncles and father. He sneaked himself to Afghanistan for Pete’s sake.

Yes, he should set an example. Or should he? As I said, he’s never going to be king. He hasn’t asked to be there like our footballers or other slebs. His grandfather has turned insulting foreigners into a cult practice. I’m not excusing racism, I don’t condone the use of racist language, I just think this needs to be taken in context. He’s a young guy, in the army – a world the screws clearly have no understanding of. He’s trying to turn his freak show of a life into something worth while. Let’s do him a favour and lay off the kid eh? So he gets kicked out the army or is forced to resign his commission, what now? The royal circuit of engagements and more drunken nights at Whisky Mist. Excellent.